Dark Stars – John F.D. Taff (editor)

Horror is something like black taffy these days, enough elasticity to stretch across any room (even the word “room” feels a little confining while discussing the modern state of horror: Is it a room actually? Could be something else), and you’ll find that elasticity here in the pages of this book. 

The Attentionist by Caroline Kepnes

Reg and Maeve really want Tony to call. Naturally, he’ll have a friend so the sisters will be able to go on a double date. 

The phrase you learn in school is fight or flight. As if those are the only choices. As if we’re all so quick to throw a punch or make a run for it. Some of us are slow. We just need a minute to think. 

A Life in Nightmares by Ramsey Campbell

When past and present, reality and nightmares collide. 

“I don’t know why I should dream about the past” 

Papa Eye by Priya Sharma

When Ravi goes to the island, they see life and death in a whole new light. 

“We’ve been struggling with how to explain it. Now you can see for yourself.” 

Volcano by Livia Llewellyn

A new job, a new colleague, a pervasive darkness. 

It still bothers me that I can’t remember last night. 

All the Things He Called Memories by Stephen Graham Jones 

When you’re quarantining with your partner, a research scientist, who wants to discuss your greatest fear. You know, besides the pandemic. 

“Because our minds are puzzle boxes,” Marcy said, obviously. “You can twist them this way, that way, and, if you’re really lucky, maybe once in a while you unlock one of them.” 

Trinity River’s Blues by Chesya Burke 

Jazz, a murder of crows and a woman who sees dead people. 

“This here … this is longing. Its power manifested. You don’t understand who you are and so you let your fears and insecurities control you.” 

The Familiar’s Assistant by Alma Katsu

Eric has spent weeks tracking him down. Now he’s standing at the vampire’s door. 

You can’t accept a monster in your life and think that you’re safe. That you’ll be able to control him. 

Swim in the Blood of a Curious Dream by John F.D. Taff 

Peter just wants to drive his son to their new home. The weather has other ideas. So does Peter’s dead wife. 

Because, as I’ve learned, separation doesn’t diminish the love a child has for their parent.
Nor does death. 

The Sanguintalist by Gemma Files

The blood speaks to Lala. 

Tell me now. Show me, if you can’t form the words. Let me see it.
Let me see it all. 

Mrs. Addison’s Nest by Josh Malerman

This all started in detention fifteen years ago. It ends now. 

REMEMBER WHERE YOU ARE 

Challawa by Usman T. Malik

Karisma returns to Pakistan with her husband. While she’s there, she plans to do some research. 

“Challawa. A mercurial creature that shimmers and is gone. A mirage that evaporates when you get close to it.” 

Enough For Hunger and Enough For Hate by John Langan

Michelle is trying to track down her brother’s killer. And his body. 

“There was nothing I wanted more than to spend every waking second with her.” 

Usually when I pick up an anthology, it’s because there’s one particular author’s story I need to read. This time around, that author was Stephen Graham Jones. 

With anthologies, I always find the stories are a bit of a mixed bag. I love this because there’s usually something for everyone. I also dread this because I know it’s just as likely I’ll encounter stories that I’m not so keen on.

My horror preference is the “would you like more blood with that?” variety. I actively seek out reads where I have the overwhelming urge to look over my shoulder and question whether it’s safe to turn out the lights, as well as my decision to eat before reading. I’m not as comfy with ambiguity so some reads here didn’t work as well for me. 

I enjoyed many of the stories but they didn’t elicit fear in me. The most horrified I felt was when I realised I’d finished more than one story with no way of explaining what it was about because I had no idea.

One of my favourite things about anthologies is the opportunity to find authors whose books have somehow flown under my radar. While I loved the story I came here for, I was also introduced to two authors whose books I definitely need to investigate in the near future: Priya Sharma and Usman T. Malik.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Titan Books for the opportunity to read this anthology. 

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Created as an homage to the 1980 classic horror anthology, Dark Forces, edited by Kirby McCauley, this collection contains 12 original novelettes showcasing today’s top horror talent. Dark Stars features all-new stories from award-winning authors and up-and-coming voices like Stephen Graham Jones, Priya Sharma, Usman T. Malik, Caroline Kepnes, and Alma Katsu, with seasoned author John F.D. Taff at the helm. An afterword from original Dark Forces contributor Ramsey Campbell is a poignant finale to this bone-chilling collection.

Within these pages you’ll find tales of dead men walking, an insidious secret summer fling, an island harbouring unspeakable power, and a dark hallway that beckons. You’ll encounter terrible monsters – both human and supernatural – and be forever changed. The stories in Dark Stars run the gamut from traditional to modern, from dark fantasy to neo-noir, from explorations of beloved horror tropes to the unknown – possibly unknowable – threats.

It’s all in here because it’s all out there, now, in horror.

Judy Moody #16: Judy Moody in a Monday Mood – Megan McDonald

Illustrations – Peter H. Reynolds

Did you know that most people don’t smile for the first time on a Monday until after 11am?

Judy is having a grouchy, no smile Monday until she notices something different about her classroom. The bulletin board doesn’t have a rainbow of paper crayons on it today. They’ve been replaced by bubble wrap animals.

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Not that kind.

Mr. Todd informs his class that today they’ll be celebrating Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day, and what could turn a glum day into a fun day quicker than bubble wrap?

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Her Monday frown now turned upside down, Judy comes up with a brilliant idea: why not find something new to celebrate every day!

What follows is a wacky week featuring rat stew, ice cream for breakfast and fun facts. 

“Can you believe Bubble Wrap started out as wallpaper?” 

I loved Mr. Todd’s tie. Accessorising bubble wrap style is right up my alley. 

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Be on the lookout for a pig called PeeGee WeeGee and Ninja Squirrel.

If you want to celebrate the weird and the wonderful, a good place to find inspiration is Days of the Year.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

For anyone who has ever had the Sunday night blues, Judy declares that every day can be a holiday if you just find something to celebrate. Happy National Eat Ice Cream for Breakfast Day, anyone?

Crumbs! Why can’t every day be Saturday?

Judy Moody is Monday-morning mopey. Another week in her same-old seat at her same-old desk in her same-old school. Even worse, there aren’t any days off from school for ages. But when she steps into Class 3T, Judy’s Monday frown turns upside down. Pop! Pop! Pop-pop-pop! Mr. Todd is making Monday special by celebrating Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day (no lie)! This gives Judy an idea that just-might-maybe turn her week around: why not make every day of the week a holiday? But after she and her friends come up with a week’s worth of wacky celebrations, from feeding ninja squirrels to honoring National Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbour’s Porch Day, will the weekend be one big letdown?

Fluffy McWhiskers Cuteness Explosion – Stephen W. Martin

Illustrations – Dan Tavis

Fluffy McWhiskers is cursed with cuteness. 

Yes, Fluffy McWhiskers was so cute that if you saw her … you’d explode. 

Which, if you think about it, kinda ups the danger level of reading this book.

It’s a lonely existence when no one lives long enough to be your friend. Fluffy goes to extreme lengths to save potential victims but nothing seems to work. Is she destined to be alone forever?

I am so conflicted. I don’t know whether to tell you that I laughed at the absurdity of this book or how ashamed I feel for finding a massacre of cutie patooties amusing. Granted, they were very pretty rainbow explosions, but so many adorable animals (many of which I found cuter than Fluffy) died explodey deaths all over the pages.

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I do have one question. If even seeing Fluffy’s photo in a newspaper is a death sentence, then how did the photographer and the rest of the newspaper staff survive long enough to publish that edition of the Animal Times?

Be on the lookout out for the Piggy Bank and Pizza Sloth Express.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Meet Fluffy – an adorable kitten. So adorable, in fact, that anyone who sees her will spontaneously explode into balls of sparkles and fireworks. KABOOM! Poof. 

Poor Fluffy doesn’t want anyone to get hurt, but everything she tries, even a bad haircut, just makes her cuter! So Fluffy runs away someplace no one can find her. Find out if there’s any hope for Fluffy in this funny and subversive story about self-acceptance and finding friendship in unlikely places.

The Shadow Glass – Josh Winning

‘In a forgotten time, in a forgotten world, deep within a forgotten chamber few have ever seen, the Shadow Glass sees all.’ 

Bob Corman’s 1986 feature debut, The Shadow Glass, was a flop at the box office. The “puppet-animated fantasy adventure” has since gained a cult following but Bob’s son, who was one of The Shadow Glass’ first super-fans, wants nothing to do with it. 

Jack’s childhood, once a magical place brimming with imagination and joy, darkened when his father morphed from his hero to someone he barely recognised as his obsession with Iri (pronounced eerie) and its inhabitants consumed him.

Returning to his childhood home after his father’s death, Jack discovers the characters, born in his father’s imagination, are very much alive. And they need Jack’s help.

Now erplings Bobson, a Melia, fanboy Toby and the Guild must join forces with kettu Zavanna and Brol if they have any hope of saving Iri from imminent destruction. 

‘Are you friend or food?’ 

The Shadow Glass is a love letter to the 80’s films that infused themselves into my very core and it’s about fandom: the obsessive, possessive fans that make it creepy (‘why else do you think they call us fanatics?’) and those whose love and dedication keep franchises alive. It’s about family, the ones we’re born into and the ones we form along the way. Above all, this is a hero’s journey. 

‘What is a hero but a normal person overcoming their own failings to defeat the demons of their soul?’ 

I primarily identify as a book nerd so it’s a rare week that passes without me needing to book evangelise the most recent treasure I’ve discovered. This book, though… I haven’t had this much fun reading since Dan Hanks’ Swashbucklers.

Both books major in 80’s nostalgia. Swashbucklers was the Ghostbusters/Goonies mashup I didn’t know I needed. The Shadow Glass had me reminiscing about borrowing and reborrowing The Dark Crystal and The NeverEnding Story from my local video store.

There’s no shortage of action in this book and the characters became so real to me it felt like I was fighting alongside them. I don’t know how it’s possible to feel nostalgia for a movie I’ve never seen and doesn’t exist (yet) but here we are. What’s going to stay with me the most, though, is this book’s heart. 

I related to Bobson as he navigated his complicated family legacy, while figuring out who he is and what he stands for. I was fangirling alongside Toby as his passion for Iri made him practically glow from within. Occasionally I empathised with Cutter, as his pain distorted something that was once pure.

There’s so much to lub about this book. I lub the erplings. I lub kettu. I lub lubs. I even lub Kunin Yillda.

It’s fairly common for me to finish a book and immediately want to see the movie adaptation of it, whether it currently exists or not. I need a movie of this book but I also need Bob Corman’s original 1986 movie in my life. 

‘It’s real and scary and it’s not safe.’ 

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Titan Books for the opportunity to fall in lub with Iri.

Rating: 5 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Jack Corman is failing at life. Jobless, jaded and facing the threat of eviction, he’s also reeling from the death of his father, one-time film director Bob Corman. Back in the eighties, Bob poured his heart and soul into the creation of his 1986 puppet fantasy The Shadow Glass, but the film flopped on release and Bob was never the same again.

In the wake of Bob’s death, Jack returns to his decaying childhood home, where he is confronted with the impossible – the puppet heroes from The Shadow Glass are alive, and they need his help. Tipped into a desperate quest to save the world from the more nefarious of his father’s creations, Jack teams up with an excitable fanboy and a spiky studio exec to navigate the labyrinth of his father’s legacy and ignite a Shadow Glass resurgence that could, finally, do Bob proud.

The Butterfly Club #1: The Ship of Doom – M.A. Bennett

Illustrations – David Dean

Watch out for the Watch. 

When Luna attends a meeting of her aunt’s Butterfly Club, she discovers the club’s true purpose: they’re time travellers who ‘borrow’ technology from the future to “bring progress forward.” 

‘I must tell you that time travel is perfectly possible.’
‘But how?’
‘All in good time.’ 

Before she’s even got her head around the fact that time travel exists, Luna learns that she’s about to see the future for herself. Luna and her two travelling companions, Konstantin, an avid reader with a clockwork heart, and Aidan, who has a “brain like a machine”, are about to board the Time Train for their very first mission.

The trio are tasked with retrieving a very important item from Southampton in 1912. It’s on board an unsinkable ship. 

This is a story of friendship and adventure, one where ordinary people can be heroes. Being true to yourself is valued and integrity is modelled by a number of characters. 

There are also some characters whose motives are more self serving and there’s a decidedly dastardly character, who I’m keen to get to know better as the series progresses. I love a good villain.

I enjoyed seeing all of the ways that humans and machinery interact in this book. Besides the boy with a clockwork heart, there’s also a man with a pocket watch eye and something intriguing about Luna’s aunt. 

‘Tiny, tiny changes can have huge consequences.’ 

Butterflies weave their way through the story, from the butterfly effect to butterfly kisses. There’s also a metaphor that helps explain something important about one of the characters. My personal favourite was the use of butterflies to describe colours, e.g., a “yellow gown the colour of an Eastern Tiger Swallowtail butterfly”. 

While much of the story lined up with what I know of the Titanic’s voyage, there was one part of the story that didn’t match what I’d previously heard. When Luna sees the iceberg that sinks the Titanic, it is said to look as though it has been “lit from within” as a result of the moonlight. My understanding is that it was a moonless night when the Titanic sank.

As someone who has inhaled as many stories and movies about time travel as I can find, I questioned some of the ways time travel worked in this book.

Over the course of the book, Luna and her new friends travel to the same day on multiple occasions. Although they are in the same areas at the same time as they were previously and have conversations with the same people, their selves from the first time they lived that day are nowhere to be found. I kept thinking of Marty McFly watching the Delorean speeding through the Twin Pines Mall Lone Pine Mall car park on its way to 1985 at the end of the first movie (and the times he has to avoid running into himself in 1985 in the second one).

There is a discussion about not being able to take someone back to a time when they were younger because of the potential timey wimey consequences of having two of the same person in the same time. Knowing that the person they were talking about was soon going to stop breathing permanently, I wondered why they couldn’t take them to a day in the future shortly after the date of their untimely death.

David Dean’s illustrations are stunning. I absolutely adored the clockwork butterfly.

I’ll be boarding the Time Train when my new friends travel to their second mission. Next stop: the Valley of the Kings. 

‘When are you?’ 

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Welbeck Flame, an imprint of Welbeck Children’s Limited, for the opportunity to read this book.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Greenwich, London, 15th February 1894.

Luna thinks that an evening at her aunt’s butterfly club sounds deathly boring.

But it turns out that the meeting, held in the Butterfly Room at the Greenwich Observatory, is not at all as Luna expects. The Butterfly Club is a society with an unusual secret … they use time travel to plunder the future for wonders.

Together with her friends, Konstantin and Aidan, and a clockwork cuckoo, Luna boards the Time Train. The gang travel to 1912 and find themselves aboard a great ship travelling from Southampton to New York. They locate a man called Guglielmo Marconi and his new invention: the wireless radio. But as the ship heads into icy waters, they discover its name:

The RMS TITANIC

Can Luna and the boys save Marconi and his invention from the doomed ship?

Can they get the radio back home to the Butterfly Club?

And how will their actions change the rest of time?

The Super Adventures of Ollie and Bea #4: Bats What Friends Are For – Renée Treml

Just when I didn’t think this series could get any bat-ter… 

Ollie the owl is looking for Bea the bunny, but can’t find her anywhere. Hanging around, though, is Kimmee, a bat who loves jokes.

Ollie and Kimmee have a “WHEELY fun” time together. They even join forces to tackle a mysterious mystery. 

When the two new friends finally hoppen upon Bea, Bea isn’t very hoppy to see them. Bea’s not convinced the Super Team has room for one more, especially someone who clearly already has a bond with her best friend.

This series focuses on friendship. The friends encourage one another, laugh and have fun together (with plenty of knock knock jokes and puns), and support each other to face and solve problems. 

It can be scary for kids when one of their friends makes a new friend. This book acknowledges that while also inviting them to be open to making new friends themselves.

Kimmee is a great new addition to the Super Team, which also includes CeeCee the otter, Pedro the chameleon, Sera the deer and Simon the squirrel. 

As I’ve come to expect from Renée Treml’s books, the illustrations are Bea-utiful. The characters are expressive and Kimmee looks absolutely adorable in their beanie.

This was a bat-tastic read. You bat-cha Bea-lieve owl be hanging out for the next book.

Thank you so much to Allen & Unwin for the opportunity to read this book.

Rating: 5 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Some-BUNNY is missing! HOO could it Bea?

Ollie makes a BAT-tastic new friend, but Bea’s not very HOPPY about it. Can Ollie show Bea that there’s OWLways room for one more friend? 

Join Ollie and Bea in their joyful playtime adventures. The perfect book for young readers who love to laugh.

The Super Adventures of Ollie and Bea #3: Wise Quackers – Renée Treml

Ollie the owl is too old to play with stuffed toys. Well, that’s what he’d like to Bea-lieve anyway. Then he meets Bea the bunny’s “bestest, most favourite-est stuffed toy”, Duckie.

Bea hops off home to get her mask so they can play superheroes, leaving Duckie in Ollie’s capable hands. Except Ollie accidentally sorta kinda takes playing with stuffed ducks to a whole new level. 

Now there’s a mystery to solve but if the Super Team are going to quack this case, Ollie is going to have to own up to what really happened.

Ollie and Bea are joined by the other Super Team members, CeeCee the otter, Pedro the chameleon (who speaks Spanish), Sera the deer and Simon the squirrel, as they work to solve this case.

This is a fun series that majors on friendship. Each story has an age appropriate message about being a good friend. 

In this story, Ollie makes a mistake, which he initially tries to hide from his friends. When he finally tells them the truth, his friends all work together to help him fix the problem. Teamwork prevails, Ollie’s friends don’t hold his mistake against him and there’s a hoppy ending.

Puns and jokes abound on this series and the characters are so loveable. I particularly enjoy the illustrations, which clearly show the emotions of the characters, and the colours used. 

I would have adored this series as a kid. Adult me is just as impressed. Of course, I had to reread the first two books before beginning this one and they were just as good as the first time I read them. 

Bring on the bat-tastic book 4!

Thank you so much to Allen & Unwin for the opportunity to read this book.

Rating: 5 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Ollie has a mystery to solve, and Bea suspects FOWL play!

Ollie is OWL grown up and doesn’t play with stuffed toys – but then where did Bea’s toy go? It might take a DUCKtective to help QUACK this case!

Join Ollie and Bea and their delightful friends. The perfect book for young readers who love to laugh.

There are Birds Everywhere – Britta Teckentrup

Text – Camilla de la Bedoyere

Anyone who’s known me for more than a couple of days has likely heard me talk about birds. For a number of years I was able to get to know an incredible range of different birds, from kookaburras and butcher birds to currawongs and magpies. Their distinct personalities delighted me and I ended up naming most of them. Over time, they learned to trust me and even flew to me when I called me their names.

Suffice it to say, I’m always going to want to read books about birds, especially when there are new fun facts to absorb.

Covering just some of the over 10,000 species of birds that currently take to the skies around the world (and the few who have chosen instead to walk), this book teaches readers about their anatomy, where they live and what they eat. 

Tracing the evolution of birds throughout history, from the dinosaurs to today, I read about many I’d never heard of before. My favourite was the <i>Argentavis</i>, a predatory bird with a wingspan of six metres!

There is more detailed information about the lives of specific birds, including barn owls, emperor penguins and Arctic terns.

Of course, I did have a few favourite facts.

A bald eagle’s nest “can weigh as much as a small elephant!”

Of the sandgrouse, who live in the desert:

Males sit in waterholes where their feathers soak up water, like a sponge. Then they fly back to the nest and the chicks suck on their feathers when they are thirsty.

Arctic terns fly the equivalent of three return trips to the moon during their lifetime. That’s 2.4 million kilometres!

The facts are bite sized and the illustrations are beautiful. My favourite illustration featured a barn owl swooping down in the night sky. This was exactly the type of book I would have borrowed from the library for school projects.

Thank you so much to Allen & Unwin for the opportunity to read this book.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

There are birds everywhere! Some of them live by the sea, some of them in the savannah, and some might live in your roof.

There are Birds Everywhere is the fourth in a series of non-fiction books from Britta Teckentrup. Young readers will learn where in the world all sorts of birds can be found and all the weird and wonderful things about them that they never imagined were true.

With an added search-and-find element, this is non-fiction with spark and personality from a much-loved illustrator.

Phoebe and Her Unicorn #15: Unicorn Selfies – Dana Simpson

This collection begins with Marigold and Phoebe attending the unveiling of their brand new clubhouse, which wouldn’t be complete if they weren’t pixie punked. Now the clubhouse is finished, all they need to do is figure out what kind of club they are.

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A good portion of this collection focuses on Marigold preparing for and attending her family reunion. Phoebe and Marigold attend the reunion in style because unicorn and once there Marigold catches up with some familiar faces. She also meets some of her family for the first time.

When the reunion is not the focus, Marigold makes Phoebe’s problems disappear and Phoebe helps Marigold with her self help book. Marigold’s shadow goes to the dark side and a conspiracy theory is tested. 

In keeping with the honour that is being Marigold’s best friend, Marigold bestows upon Phoebe her unicorn name. This is also the collection where we learn the number 5 is a dragon called Jim who “rains death from above”. 

Phoebe’s powers of observation are called into question.

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More than once.

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Because so much time was spent in the lead up to and attendance of Marigold’s family reunion, there wasn’t quite as much variety in this collection. I enjoyed finally getting to meet more of Marigold’s family but I missed Dakota, who was only mentioned in passing. Max also only had a small part to play. 

I always enjoy hanging out with Marigold and Phoebe, “knower of unicorn secrets”. I’m looking forward to the next collection already.

Book in a book: Phoebe reads The Neverending Story. I also attempted to read this as a nine year old but couldn’t understand at the time why the book didn’t replicate the movie exactly, not realising the book came first. Note to self: finish reading The Neverending Story.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for the opportunity to read this graphic novel.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

Phoebe Howell and her best friend, the dazzling unicorn Marigold Heavenly Nostrils, have all kinds of exciting things planned for the summer. Their adventures include constructing a secret clubhouse with Phoebe’s friend Max (enlisting the help of some magic pixies along the way) and preparing for a trip to Marigold’s unicorn family reunion. Along the way, readers will meet all kinds of new characters, learn what magic spells are best avoided, and have all kinds of sparkling unicorn fun.

Disney Manga: Beauty and the Beast – The Beast’s Tale – Mallory Reaves (Adapter)

Illustrations – Studio DICE

Colours – Gianluca Papi

I read Belle’s Tale, the companion to this story, first and it didn’t live up to my expectations, so they were much lower when I began reading the Beast’s perspective. Although I have historically focused most of my attention on Belle’s point of view (her reading habits are so relatable), being able to see things from the Beast’s was a refreshing change. 

Sure, it’s still a story of an angry young man imprisoning a bookish young woman, who then falls in love with her jailer… And this manga-style graphic novel is based on the live-action adaptation that I couldn’t get into instead of the animated one that I was obsessed with as a kid. And Mrs Potts is just as creepy here as she was in Belle’s Tale

But I quite enjoyed this one. It includes some of the Beast’s backstory and his thoughts on how his life has played out so far. 

While Belle’s story was coloured in tones that matched her optimism, the Beast’s story begins as dark as his moods and gradually brightens as Belle’s impact on him grows.

The proportions are variable. When the Beast first captures Belle’s father, the Beast looks colossal. I don’t claim to understand art so this may be a way of highlighting the Beast’s power, but it looked odd, especially when compared to the next page where the proportions are more realistic. 

I absolutely loved the front covers of the two tales, which joined together form a single image. It works both from a marketing perspective and a visual one. I know I’d have to buy a matching set.

The cursed (and I use this term lightly) object I most need in my life is the book that takes escapism to a whole new level.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and TOKYOPOP for the opportunity to read this graphic novel.

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Once Upon a Blurb

In Disney’s live-action film Beauty and the Beast, Belle, a bright, beautiful, and independent young woman, is taken prisoner by a beast in his castle. Despite her fears, she befriends the castle’s enchanted staff and learns to look beyond the Beast’s hideous exterior and realise the kind heart and soul of the true Prince inside. Dark, cool, muted colours show the Beast’s pessimistic view of the world in this full-colour manga-style graphic novel, which explores the Beast’s struggle as he tries to move on from his past and learn what it is to love.